Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Review: Ultimate Lesbian Erotica 2007 by Alison Foster (Editor)

Alison Foster (Editor)
Ultimate Lesbian Erotica 2007

Published by Alyson Publications

Reviewed by Kate Evans

Ladies-who-love-ladies in need of some titillation need look no further than this buxom volume of short erotic tales. Here you’ll find thin women, fat women, muscle women, big boobs, little boobs, cowgirls and ‘cowbois’, and chicks with dicks! Plus more muffs, pecs, abs and short fingernails than you can shake a silicone stick at. Hell, we’ll even throw in a lesbian ghost sex-orgy.

These stories are at their best when they deliver the shameless filth we were after. The opener, the delicately-named “Lick’er License”, is a shining example. Unashamedly brash, racy, raunchy, and above all, never taking itself too seriously. Likewise the delightful “Exercise Dyke”, where we know we’re in for a treat from the beginning: “I had just finished my third set of bicep curls…”.

The sex scenes themselves are the erotica equivalent of fast food. They are cheap, unrefined, filling; and rather tasty! There’s an array of sexual adventures here saucy enough to make your mother blush: whips, handcuffs, silicone being freed from slacks, fake mustaches bristling, and “dangling dildos duelling in the dark”. No, seriously.

Certain stories are let down by some unfortunate choice of vocabulary. For me personally, nothing inspires celibacy quite like the term ‘woman-cavern’. The same, I’m afraid, goes for ‘woman-lips’, ‘mound’, and ‘my throbbing rosebud’. But the ultimate no-no was perhaps the climactic unleashing of a dildo affectionately named…Dudley.

These small quibbles aside, I heartily recommend Ultimate Lesbian Erotica 07 for light reading of an evening. It is a welcome addition to my bedside drawer, where it will be joining the housemaid’s uniform and feather-duster.

Kate Evans lives in London, where she is writing short stories and poems of a queer theme. She is currently working towards having some pieces published in queer journals. She also hopes to shortly take her Masters in Illustration; for which she will be creating a queer comic strip with a helicopter/ horse/ dragon-riding heroine. She is firmly rooted in reality. Kate can be contacted at: creamcheeks@yahoo.co.uk

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